Friday, September 22, 2006

Happy one year anniversary to me! I have been here in Chi-town for 1 year. One year at the new job, one year in the new place, one year in the big city. It is still amazing to me how quickly time passes now that I am an adult. I remember thinking when will I be old enough to drive?... when will I be old enough to drink?... when will I be old? I’m not old, but I am really starting to feel like a grown up. I have a grown up job (not that I didn’t have decent jobs before, the environment was just not nearly as professional), I bought my first car (all on my own), I’m looking at condos. For the first time in my life, I’m concerned about the amount of money I am pissing away. I worry about my parents and how much more time I have with them. I worry about whether or not I am going to find that special someone who can put up with all my crap. I worry about if I’m going to be too old to have children before I get married. I worry.

When I don’t have enough to worry about myself, I worry about others. My worry now is my new friend, CB. Her husband is thinking of volunteering to serve a year in Iraq. He’s a military man and he wants to do his duty. I completely understand both sides of the story – he needs to fulfill his duty to his country and he feels this is the way to do it; but at the same time, he needs to fulfill his duty to his home and his wife. What do you do? It’s so easy for me (if I had to make the decision) because I don’t have a spouse to think about, so it’s just me. What do you do when you have to think about this other person in your life and what they need or want? It’s not like moving across the country or changing jobs – this is WAR. This is life and death. How do you decide whether or not to risk your life? Especially when someone else is involved. I can give all the pros and be very rational about it for CB, but I can’t help her with her heart and that is very hard for me. My gut and my faith tell me he is going to be okay, whatever happens, but what does that mean for another person? I don’t know. I’m going to let this stew for a while.

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